Should I tell someone when they are being continually negative?

It can get annoying being around someone who’s negative all the time, even if it’s someone you care about.  It’s not that I don’t sympathize with what they’re dealing with.  It’s not that I don’t care about their problems, but after a while I just don’t want to hear it anymore.  I’m becoming frustrated, having to be patient with them.  Isn’t telling a friend the truth something that I should do, however, with great thought.

I’ve debated with myself the best way of dealing with my friend being constantly negative, here are a few things I’ve been thinking about before trying to decide whether or not I want to say something about it to them:

  • How are they being negative?
  • What exactly are they doing that’s bothering me?
  • Are they really being unnecessarily negative?
  • or, am I being too sensitive to what they’re talking about?
  • Do they realize how negative they’re being?

Everyone has that one friend who is always the first to complain in any situation. These people bring negativity into our lives, and the social networking craze allows us to hear about how much they hate this/that even more than ever.

I can’t think of a reason to get rid of them as a friend besides being a total downer, otherwise they would have disappeared from my life, Facebook and Twitter feeds long ago.  Instead, because they have never wronged me they stay in my life (well once they did).  The most frustrating thing about negative people is that they see the worst in everything, even Christmas, Easter, Birthdays and Halloween.

I’ve read all the tips on dealing with negative people, spoken to other friends to grasp a different perspective (am I the one overacting? what should I do to help?), I apply this information on each occasion I see my friend, and so far limiting contact with them is the most effective.  All the negativity goes away… like magic… Really it does, because I’m not around them or in communication with them.  I think that the person they are, is a great person and has endless possibilities in front of them if they only took a chance.  It’s the negativity about everything around them that gets me down, when they have so much to be happy for in their life.

Should I tell someone when they are being continually negative? Maybe. Will it ruin our friendship? Maybe. Will it open their mind to a different perspective? Maybe.


One thought on “Should I tell someone when they are being continually negative?

  1. I think the biggest problem you face, is not so much understanding the person who is being so – consistently negative, but understanding your own responses and how their behavior affects you.

    We all kind of cruise in a little bubble. And from time to time, we find ourselves in a position where we get little enjoyment out of everything in our lives. We often wish to express this to others, but it is hard to do so.

    Whoever this is about, is someone that needs some direction – some help. They need to be shown to express what the love and not what they hate. Negativity will always exist in the world, but it does need to be balanced.

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