A few months ago my cousin described me as Leftovers – A person over 25 who is not either married or already with someone. Basically, if your over 25 and still single… your Leftovers. I felt insulted.
Being called Leftovers has stuck a cord with me, I have pondered and discussed the comment and idea of being Leftovers for months now. But is it true… Am I/we Leftovers?
The Free Dictionary defines leftovers as:
- noun. Remaining as an unused portion or amount.
- A remnant or an unused portion.
- leftovers Food remaining from a previous meal. – “he had leftovers for dinner last night”.
Wikipedia defines leftovers as:
- Leftovers are the uneaten edible remains of a meal after the meal is over, and everyone has finished eating.
Looking at the definition of Leftovers and comparing it to being single, I would be considered an:
- Unused portion.
- Remaining from a previous relationship.
- Been left over after everyone has finished getting married/de facto relationships.
So, if you are 25 years old and still not married/taken, there’s something wrong with you? Men and women of our age are accused of being to: Loose, not settling, too focused on partying or their career, getting their lives together, figuring out who they are, traveling the world, figuring out what they want and being too independent.
But judging by the divorce rate in our country, we the leftovers are the smart ones. Mostly people who get married between the ages of 18 and 25 are now divorced… I always wonder where they went wrong with their lives. Yet my mother always reminds me how she hopes I will find a good husband one day. Here I was, thinking all along that I was still young and had plenty of time. But apparently, being 28 and single is akin to being a desperately, hopeless, outcast of society. But with so many other people choosing to focus on their career, traveling etc, before settling down, am I really so different from all the other leftovers out their?
I still want to further my career, travel, and enjoy living the way I am for a few more years. I’m okay with not being anywhere close to being married, but then there’s this nagging thought in the back of my mind that reminds me that I do in fact wish I had someone in my life. Not to consider marrying right now, but just someone to pass the time with and share my life with. Someone to be my companion and eat good food with me. Someone to give me hot sex on a regular basis (sorry to my relatives who had to read that!). I enjoy the fact that I am independent and can take care of myself. But sometimes, you don’t want to have to go through it all on your own. And it makes it even harder when you have your family reminding you how alone you are, and insinuating that you’re becoming increasingly hopeless…. or a leftover.
Then I stumbled across this under the term Leftovers: Relic – Before leftovers were called leftovers, they were called relics.
The Free Dictionary defines relic as:
- noun. something that has survived from the past.
- an antiquity that has survived from the distant past.
- something of sentimental value.
I/we could be relic’s, having survived from our past relationships, because of these past relationships we now have more sentimental value to offer to another. When I look at most people in their late 20’s, early 30’s, for the most part the ones who are single are simply more interesting to me than the ones who are married/taken. The ones who are married are no longer living for themselves. It’s all about the husband and the kids. I’m not saying they are not happy, but as an outsider looking in, it doesn’t seem all that interesting. There is so much you can do with your life before getting married and dedicating your lives to each other.