“And we went through heaps of guys together”


Earlier last week I had a plan to write on my Blog about Public Speaking.  Since being overly busy with my Best Friend Kyla’s wedding and sleeping any moment I could, I am finally laying in bed now getting to my point.

As the Maid of Honor I finally accepted the challenge of doing a wedding speech in front of my best friends 50 something guests at their wedding Friday night.

After much discussion with my mother on the phone about ideas of what to say, and finally deciding that drinking two Lemon Ruski’s I had left over in the fridge would get the words flowing from my figure tips to a computer screen…. I came up with this speech that was so sentimental and carefully written…. I knew it was all true, but not very ‘me’.

While I typed the speech I began to have the same overwhelming gut feeling about doing an Oral Presentation like I did throughout school.  I could never get over my nerves, on the day my Oral Presentation was due I would become so sick in my stomach I would end up taking the day off school sick.  Many presentations were done one on one with teachers with the acceptance of reducing my grade to save myself from standing in front of 20 or so pairs of eyes and passing out.

When it comes to song and dance as a child and teenager I was happy to dance in front of all the parents who had children enrolled in physical culture along side myself.  As the adult I’ve become, I am normally the person in the back of the room heckling the comedian to be more funny or telling him his dreaming.  I love to get up and sing Karaoke in Pubs and Clubs, I’m not a great singer at all, but who’s gonna stop me? Batman?  The amount of crazy things that I say or do around my friends no one would realize I have a public speaking issue at all.  I show too much confidence, that when telling friends how freaked out I was becoming about the very idea it seemed they were a little shocked.  ‘Not the loud mouthed girl with the hyper personality… she’s shy when it comes to public speaking?’.

So there I was on the wedding day.  Carefully selecting my drinks, not drinking too much before the speech, giving my mother and friend Brodie who I invited along a hug any time I was feeling very overwhelmed about the ever approaching time of 7:45 pm when the speeches would begin.  I knew I was to be speaking after the Groom’s, Grants mother.  When Grant’s mother stepped away from the stand…. I felt so sick.  I looked at Karly the Bridesmaid beside me and all I could say was ‘Your coming with me still. right?’.  Johnny the MC for the wedding did a introducing  joke and finally welcomed me to the stand.  I took my A4 piece of paper with me Karly following behind me and thought ‘Why couldn’t I have done a Interpretative Dance like Sarah suggested’.  I had already decided that picturing the audience naked was a terrible idea, having never work in the past, why would it now. I looked at my Mum and then Brodie, both smiling with that look of support in their eyes.  Then I took a deep breath and looked at Kyla….

I began… I thanked the Bridesmaids for all their help, told the Bride Kyla how beautiful she looked. All day I felt that I could have never told her how beautiful she was because every time I looked at her my smile would just widen that little bit further than normal, Kyla was just absolutely beautiful, she was my Barbie Doll.  Spoke about how honored I was to be Maid of Honor to my two best friends who have found love, how I had introduced them via MSN and look where technology has brought us today.  I started talking about how Kyla and I met in Grade 3, doing Physical Culture together, being spice girl crazy, how we party hard together and…. The bomb that I added right there and then to my speech – ‘we went through heaps of guys together’.  The whole audience interrupted into laughter. This is the only thing I will ever be remembered for at this wedding!

After saying under my voice ‘Holy Shit’, I continued my speech as pre-written trying to keep my jitters in line and preventing myself from slapping my head repetitively!  I am so thankful that Karly was up their with me, giving me support and saying words that gave me confidence.  I toasted the happy couple and added my own little nerd alert of  ‘Live Long and Prosper’ to the end and too my seat and started drinking!

Once the speeches had finished I asked all my closest friends how they thought I went, everyone commenting on my slip up!  Everyone got a laugh at my expense and I feel I proved myself when Grant and Johnny did the Classic ‘Lift Danni in the air’ Dance Moves! Very Impressed!

A wonderful night overall, and so glad I got to spend it with the best friends I’ll ever have!

Would you like some Cake?

Mars on Life.