A Understanding of Love Smart ~ The Character of You

After last nights blog was posted a few friends seem to be concerned that I appear desperate to find a partner.  You’ve all got it completely wrong, I’m happy being single, I like a lot of the perks, but I would like the Next Big Thing to be the one. So I’m reading Dr Phil’s words of wisdom. 

To make things a little bit clearer to everyone I will discuss Chapter 4 of Love Smart.

This Chapter states that I must be scratching my head and wondering “What’s wrong with me?  Why her and not me? What am I – some kind of dog biscuit?”.  I honestly feel wore out from dating, like I have been running on a treadmill and getting nowhere fast and sweating in the process.

Lately I have had no interest at all to make any effort to meet men, and when the chance arrises I then feel burdened with negative thoughts of ‘he’ll just be another idiot only after one thing…. Sex’.

In this chapter I learn to know myself and then commit to who that is and identify the best-quality Character of Me for the world to see.  I will not be writing about the negative attitude towards yourself part of this chapter. Why? Because I already think I am awesome deep down inside, I ooze with confidence, I share my opinions and I feel that I have always had a voice to be heard.  I dress the way I want, I pretty myself up for my own confidence boosting and I feel that I leave a pretty good visual impression in most passer-buyers minds from the smiles I get.

Their is only one question that hit me with a bit of shock when saying yes to it, “Do I feel that I am not as smart, sharp or interesting as other people?”.  The Smart part has a lot to do with myself hiding my nerdy side.  Yes I’m a nerd, I love technology, I love video games, Comic Books, Sci Fi Shows etc, I want to go to Comic Con in 2012 for goodness sake.  I may not be Doctor Smart or Engineer Smart but I am Danni Smart in a completely different way to most girls out their.  I am also a complete girl, I like fashion, spending money, yummy cakes, holidays, my hair, jewelry, decorating, dogs and more.  To me, all my interests seem far from interesting to other people.  When someone asks me my interests I tend to feel ashamed, I feel that these people will not like me at all because of my different interests.  Then again why would I want to be with someone who doesn’t respect my interests.

Above are the negative thoughts I will need to rid myself of to put the best me forward.  To do this I have signed up for the Self Love Boot Camp:-

1.  Take a profound interest in me, I am to fall in love with myself the way I would fall in love with my Love Interest.  I have to express the same level of interest in myself, my life and everyone in it.  This means:  a) Looking back at my past and creating a rich personal history filled with stories and anecdotes that I don’t mind sharing with others because i know they are fascinating.  b) Playing a more active role in social and family functions so that I can learn more about the people close to me.  c) Become more engaged in work and with my coworkers because that is where my love interest – me – spends th majority of my time.

2.  To be my own best friend, talk to close friends about what parts of me that keep them coming back for more of my company.  What do they see when they look at me?

3.  Only have eyes for me.  Become more connected with myself, my wants, my needs and my future with me.

After reading this chapter I am going to spend a bit of time focusing on me and my own needs.  Learn to be genuine, as there is someone out their who wants me precisely for who I am and what I have to offer, I just need to figure out what that is first.

Mars on Life.